UPDATE : I was driven to sign this – if I can be attacked without being a ‘terf’ or even a dedicated feminist – then I can’t imagine how intolerant public speaking must be - http://www.isupportthis.co.uk/
Quite a few blog entries go like this –
1. Trigger warning
2. Present feelings
3. Terrible anecdote from past.
4. Connect anecdote to present political position of someone you hate or support.
5. Closing remarks possibly involving your fears about speaking and/or boasts wrapped up in hypothetical threats from virtual enemies.
It’s not my thing – but I read them occasionally – and because I’ve an interest in the internecine trans-terf war – I happened to read some self-serving bilge from an activist called Stavvers (Zoe Stavri – apparently- IRL)… in it she justifies tweeting to the world that a rape victim had the mind of a rapist because of this (fairly open-minded as these things go) article in the press –
I’ve been a victim of sexual assault – but never accessed any resources for it – because I always accept everything and on I go – I have no idea what’s available or what would help me… But I assume it’s about the victim accessing the service and not the victims accessing each other – so I don’t understand why this is a debate – if a group session is going to descend into a sex/gender war it’s not going to help anyone. It needs to be taken on a case-by-case basis and handled with sensitivity and care.
Anyway – apart from misgivings about how responsible for each other victims can be expected to be – I have no problem with the idea that trans women are women… and I’m not worried about bathrooms, female-only colleges or my right to talk about how hellish periods are (it’s my truth)… but I did object to the ‘mind of a rapist’ tweet.
It’s wrong. It’s abusive.
So – since Stavvers tweets on these issues night and day – I tweeted my opinion – politely.
What I got back was one ok tweet – ‘here’s the thing though: I never “told her”. Everything I said is storified. Maybe read through.’
The tweets were public – as far as I’m concerned that’s ‘telling her’… and I saw all of the tweets and her blog entry – in context… but never mind… she’s entitled to her interpretation… I stick by mine.
The next tweet I got said this – ‘also well done for ignoring what I said qbout boundaries you fucking creep’.
Because Stavvers is a survivor with boundaries – those boundaries being : never criticise her – where as I’m a fucking creep who can have anything tweeted at her.
She also made it impossible for me to RT the tweet – so I could tell people about it – but I couldn’t let them see it. This is a woman who has talked about being ‘gas lighted’.
The thing that really irks me though – is her relentless sympathy-seeking combined with her violent attacks on the ‘out-group’ – which in her case is anyone she can label a ‘terf’ or ‘creep’ (or whatever).
It’s hypocritical and destructive.
I’m blocked by her on twitter (obvs).